MiLestoNe

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in wan wik ,,, got information bout our friend passed away by Cov ,, . Seangkatan guwe gayzh ,, kurleb 40 taon ,, . Kmarenan ituh andri ,,, temen sd ,,, sekomplek sini ,, terush tadi sore ,, astari ,, anak pinter 78 ,, lulusan dokter ui ,, katanya posisi trakhir dirut rs pelni ,, .

gw tuh melihat iniii ,, ya allah ,, hidup mereka begitu baik ,, ada keluwarga yg di kasihi dan dihidupi ,, ada karir bagus yg di jalani ,,, mgkin idup mereka impiyan banyak orang ,, . And masih ada 20 taon lagi to live ,, but stopped by Cov ??? ,,, . Syedich ,, . syedich ,, . and it reflected to mine ,, to my life ,, .

terush bumi sisa annya orang2 kek gw ??? yg kek gw ??? . Orang bilang ,, orang baik ituh matinya cepet ,,, padahal yezh ,, di pikir2 ,, bumi ituh malah butuh orang2 baik wat mmpengaruhi sekitar agar mnjadi baik ,,, . yekaaaaaaaaaannn ,,, !!! ,,,,

Ciyuzh deh ,, cov ini bener2 mereduce populasi indonesiyak x yk ,,, . Trus kenapa di LN orang2 dh pada bisa jalan2 ??? huwaaaaaaaaa ,,

tapi beneran ,, stay at home ,, dah paling bener yezh ,, paling selamet ,, !!

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dann ,, banyaknya kematiyan by Cov ini ,, jadi reminding smuwa orang di bumi ,, bahwa kematiyan ituh dekat ,,, . Guwe ??? dh ^mikir nged^ dari banyak waktu yg lalu tentang waktu dan kematian yg dekat ,,, . Trus malah skrang jadi so so ,, . Ih ,, kebalik nged yezh gw ,, !! ahuhuuhuhuhu ,,,

orang2 ,, pada baik2 banged yak ,, pada alim2 amad ,,, pada berjasa2 banged ma orang lain ,,, . Lah guwaaa ,, ??????????? ,, ya tuhan ,, gini amad yk idup ???!! ,,, gw balik mo bawa apa ??? ahuuhuhuh ,,, . Seriyuzh mode ON !!

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tetiba ajah gw mikir ,,, yg sbnrnya dh gw pikir dr lama juga sik ,, alias dh tw hal ini ,,, xuman somehow ,, sore ini ,, kek ke refresh lagi ajah ,,, .

tadi tuuuu ,, denger wawancara seleb timteng ,,, yg di tanyak :: bagaymana anda memandang ibu anda ??? . Seleb ituh jawab :: uh !! my soul !! ,, . Langsung lah pikiran gw brkelana kebelakang ,,,

iya yah ,,, mama ituuu jiwa qt ,,, . Gw duluw blg ,, ga tw dengan yg lain ,, tapiiii harusnya seorang ibu ituuu ,,, jiwa qt ,, . Qt ada di duniyak through her ,,, . Yg gw blg ,, ketika emak meninggal, ituh rasanya seperti separuh jiwa di tarik paxa keluwar ,,, yg gw ga ngerti ,, ada hal yg spt ini di duniyak ini ,,, . Padahal gw merasa ,, ga trlalu romance ma emak gw ,, . yaa mgkin dengan segala keautisan gw lah ,,,

since that time ,,, gw sendiri di duniyak ini ,, .
Iyezhhh ,, papah masih hidup ,, 8 taon after ,,, but ummhh ,,, he had his own life with her new wife with all drama happened ,,, . Kakak2 gw ???? trutama yg co, yg seharusnya jd wali dan pelindung gw ??? ,,, yah ,, begitulah ,, klo masih inged ceritak debt collector kmarenan ,,, .

so yezh ,, am alone ,,, . 12 taon after my mama gone ,,, . gw trperosok dalam duniyak kelam ,, brusaha bangkit dan brhasil ,, alhamdulillah ,, . Masih pulak lah kenak cobaan debt kolektor ituh ,, #ceritak yg enih ,, . yg intinya gw abis di kerjain kk sndiri ,, 1 blood line gw sndiri ,, . xixixixiixix ,,, .

dalam 12 taon ituh ,,, ,, gw yg kecil, letoy, sakit2an, naive, sedih, sendirian ,, ngadepin duniyak yg jahat ,, . Sumpah demi allah ,,, hanya allah swt pelindung gw ,, nothing else ,, . allah swt yg mmbuwat gw bisa idup baik smpe skrang ini ,, . Yaahh ,, mgkin doa2 ortu gw juga yezh ,,, . ( punn ,, yezh, pikir gw akan blg ,, yg kasih cobaan allah, yg kelarin juga allah ,,, nothing so hard about it ,,, #susih yezh gaizh punya pikir kek gw ,, lg melo nih !!! kwkwkwkkw ,, ) ,,, .

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btw ,, pernah denger ,, katanya ,, duniyak ini terlaknat ,, kecuwali tentang allah swt ,,,, . Hmmhh ,,, segini trlaknatnya kah duniyak ini ??? ,,, and we live here ,,, ekkekekekkeke ,,

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so,, you know how active my thought is ,,, thus ,, for last couple years ,,, after many attemption and achievement ,, then ,, as usual, my thought needs something new ,, .

intinyaaa ,,, after all ,, after what i build up ,, after for all my firmed thoughts ,, the other thought said :: why we not try the opposite one ??? ,,, . Kozh beyond everything we set up on our mind ,, are about believing ,,, no one know the fact truth until let say to the day after ,, . So ,, ??

and this is a bad signal ,,, . hmmphh ,,,,,

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PPPKM seri-1, almost over ,, 03.07 – 20.07 ,, terush di perpanjang donk ,, aka ada seri-2 nyaaa ,,,, . Jadiiiii mpe 31.07 ,, . SO ppkm almost 1 month yezh ,, , better than last year ,,, early pandemic ,,, it was 3 months if am not wrong ,,, . eh ada untungnya loh ppkm iniii ,,, reguler tagihan jd lower ,, wkkwkwkkw ,,, .

meet long wiken on ppkm session ?? no difference at all ,, wkkwkwkwk

week 2 ,,

terush ,, gaiizzh ,,, dah mule bosen kan yezh ,, ??? wkkwkwkwkwk ,, . Gw aseli ga kemenong2 ,,, ( ya eya laaaaaaaah ,, secara di sekat d mana2 ,, ) ,,, ya karena emang full kerjak juga sik ,,, mpe jam 4/5 sore ,, . Udahannya langsung nongton ,, wkkwkwkw ,, . Gitu ajah 2 weeks brulang2 ,, wkkwkwkkw ,, . Dan after 2 weeks, mule bosaaaaaaann ,, karena ga bisa olga di t4 gym ,, karenaaaa ,, ya ga ada prubahan ajah ,,, hehehhehe ,,, .

Update Cov ,,

Kata temen2 yg dh kudu pcr lagi ,, antrian pcr test dh sepih ,,, . Dan yezh ,,, menandakan casenya dh mule mereda ,,, alhamdulillah ,, . Beneran ,,, sepiynya t4 pcr ,, memang menandakan rendah ato tingginya case sik ,, .

terush banyak negara2 asing yg memulangkan wargaknya dari indonesiya ,, . I think dh the best way sik ,,, . Gw jd trharuw ,,, pemerintahnya pada sayang2 amad ma wargaknya ,,, . Lah qita ??? kwkwkwkkwkw ,, . Case wuhan ??? ya less n more lah yezh ,, wkkwkwkwkwk ,,

somehow yezh gaizzh ,,, ini jg pemikiran yg baru muntjul ,,, . Karena melihat case 1 – 2 temen gw ,, yg kenak cov after vaksin ,, jadiii gw tuh branggapan mang vaksin yg skarang blom bisa digunakan properly loh ,,, . Iya sik ,, mereka blgnya :: mgkin trpapar d t4 vaksin ,, . Iya sik bisa banged ,,, tapi who knows lah yezh ,, . Kalo pikir gw sik ,, karena mang vaksin nya yg lom proper ,, jd ada yg meet ada yg gag ke badan qt ,, personal gt. Dan case meledak lately kan ,, di claim nya mang karena abis long wiken ,, tapi juga abis penggalakan vaksin ,, . Jadi mngkin ada brpa % nya netijen yg badannya ga kuwat ma tuh vaksin ,,, . Hadjuu ,, gilzh dah ,, .

gw ?? vaksin donk !! hiiyy ,, gw mah ga anti vaksin ,, . Xuman not at this momment ,, . 1, maagh gw masih nyebelin ,, 2, if pun gw vaksin, pas yg faskesnya ga penuh ,, aka casesnya dh reda ,, jadi kl gw kenapa2 bisa lgs d handle ,, wkkwkwkwkkwkw ,,, . Gilzh ajeee ,, sapa yg mo challenge ma idup yezh ,, kekekekkekek ,,, .

tapi gaiizhh ,, mang sih yezh ,,, to this cov ,, aseli imun dan daya tahan tubuh yg bener2 di andelin ,,, . Karena kl badan baik ,, ga bakal kenak ,,, insya allah ,,,

Devices ,,,

di liat2 ,,, due to banyakan wfh ,, jadinya skrg devices jadi double yk ,,, . NB duwa ,, hp duwa ,, mouse duwa ( lucuk2 lagi ,, #hallah ,,, ) ,,, . All double ,, !! ,, hanya pasangan ajah nih yg masih zero ,, eyaaaaaaaaaaaaa ,, !!! wkkwkwkwk ,, ?????

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haaayy ,,, !!!!
akhirnyaaaaaaaaaaaaa ,, !!! meet long wiken ,, !! di tengah ppkm ,, !! yg aka ga ngaruuuhh ,, !! wkwkkwkwkw ,,, . But ,, alhamdulillah ,,, senen selasa ga involve ma kantor ,, mayan ada waktu jeda pikir dan hati dari ni pikiran ,, kwkwkkwkwkwk ,, .

so ,, ! ,, senen ituh ASI livur ,, dan selasa idul adha ,, jadilah mingdep ,, xuman masuk 3 hari ,, . Ya Tuhaaaaaann ,, gmna ga bahagiyaakk ,, akkakakakakkakaka ,, alhamdulillah sangat ,, !!! . wkwkkwkwkwkwk ,,, segitunya yezh kerjak ??? hu uh ka !! segitunya ,, !!! ? ???? wkkwkwkwkwkwk ,,

so ,, ?? ,, long wiken nya mahu ngapain ???
ya ga ngapa2in ,,, wkwkwkwkwk ,, hadjuu ,, . Ya palingaaann pwasak zulhijah ajah ,,, padahal mah lebih susih pwasak di rumah loh ,, lbh ga ngapa2in ,, jd pengen makan ,, wkkwkwkwk ,, . Terush ??? pokoKmen gaiizzhh ,, !!! menikmati off dari kerjaan ajah ,, !!! ahahahaha ,,,

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spiking2 of financiyaL ,,, tadi siank ,, tebiba ajah gw mulay mendata smuwa inkam dan otkam gw ,, wkkwkwkwkkw ,, . Ini sering trjadi sik ,,, terniyat irit ,, akhirnya mah ya gone by the wind ajah dh tuh uwank ,,, kwkwkkwwk ,,

terush tadi mule lagiiii ,, di excel file kan inkam dan otkam inih ,,, . Gada niyat apa2 sik ,, kozh selama ini mikirnya :: kl da duwit ya habiskan dalam yg baik2 !! kwkwkwkwkwk ,,, gada tanggungan ini ,, jadi nikmatilah hidup ,, !!! kkekekkekekek ,,, . Dan trnyataaaaaaaa ,, average pengeluwaran gw sebulan kurleb 10juta ,,, mayan yk wat single tanpa cicilan ,, . gw pun siyok ,, !! ,,, pantes tu duit gajik ga besisak ,,, wkwkkwkwkwkwkwk ,,,

then after this mahu irit fi, ceritaknya ???
of korrrzzzhh deaar ,, !!!
what for ???
Dunno ,,
xuman pengen berenti idup hedon ajah ,,,
kekekekekkek ,,,

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#edisi going 40’s
wkwkwkkwkwkwkwk

am going 40’s this july ,, and i hv “my own” as a personal ,, . My own thought my own stance ,, my own way ,, my own goal ,, ,,, . Lately ,, i just that wondering with how people viewing this life ,,, . And somehow ,, >> i just know ,, that my live driven by allah swt ( for sure yezh kaaa ,, wkkwkwkkw ) ,,, << lately ,, nemu ajah di yucub ,, beberapa post tentang intervw / conversation with some great people ,,, . How about they are see this life ,, ,,, .

Let’s start from my view point ,,
gw ,, memandang hidup ,, hiduppp ,, ya, hidup di duniyak adalah sementara, dan goal gw adalah akhirat ,, . Almost dan keknya entire doa dan harapan gw ,, adalah tentang keselamatan di akhirat kelak ,, . IYah ,, keselamatan di akhirat ,, ini yg sangat ,, ! ,, . kadang gw mikir ,, insome gw ,, come from this thought ,, this awareness akan akhirat ,, this hard thought gw ,,

those my acts ,, driven by takut sama allah swt ,, . I think this is the most sik ,, . Jadi cam ,, takut banged duluw came first ,, then baru awarness pada allah swt maha pengasih dan penyayang ,, . Hal ini pun ,,, karena memang ,, awareness ketakutan akan huru hara the life after ,,, its a real life ,,, indeedd ,, . So ,, am dealing with allah swt for all my acts ,, .

i love allah swt ,, dalam limit gw ,, dalam pengertian gw ,, dalam cara gw ,, dalam sejatinya gw ,,, sebagay hamva ,, . Thus ,, when i heard ,, i saw people mention allah swt with tulus ,, it touch my heart ,, i can feel the vibrate also ,, . Even for something that i already know its totally wrong ,, but they said :: alhamdulillah ,, :: with very very very grateful sincerity ,,, . I just take back my thought about the wrong matter on them ( but, still the wrong matter is the wrong matter ,, wkkwkwkwk ,, ) ,, . Kozh ,,, after all ,,, its their dealing with allah swt ,, .

Then, as much as i can ,, my act ,, seen/guide/driven from allah perspective ,, . IYup ,, so many grey areya in this world ,,, but !! when i facing an issue, i calculate with my ( lower ) capability from islam perspective ,, so that i can be fully responsible to allah swt next ,, . If wrong ,, i just believe ,, allah swt will guide me to the right way/path ,, . If wrong, then i believe ,, i will not get charged for something that i never intent to be wrong ,, #once again in Islam perspective ,,, .

so yezh ,, many things ,, i effort for keselamatan di akhirat ,, insya allah amiiinn ,, . Then how bout duniyak ???

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di sini ,, yg gw liat yucub many great people intervw/conv ,, banyak hal ,, banyak perspective orang ,,, memandang hidup duniyak ,, . Karenaaaa ,, banyak pablik figur yg d wawancara ,, jadiii yaaaa ,,, masih cucmey laahh ,, karena banyak dari beberapa tema background ,,, . But one thing for common is :: they not make allah swt as goal ,,, . Ataw ,, mgkin ,, mereka tidak menggunakan kata yg tepat yezh ,, jadi ga ketangkep kesan ituh ,,, . Kan hati orang Sapa yg tw yezzhhh ,,,

iyezh ,, they did they do great things ,, they grateful to allah swt that big that sincere ,,, but ,, they talk about duniyawik as this duniyawik as their life ,, not akhirat ,,, . For sure its oK ,, !! . Then, its different from my perspective ,, . Then i thought ,, is me wrong ??? mana yg bener ??? mana yg salah ?? mana yg harus diperbaiki ,, ???

duniyak for meeee ,, iyah ,, pastinya karena gw datang dr keluwarga yg tidak brkekurangan nged ,, tidak kaya tpi tidak susah nged jugak ,,, . Jadiii ,, gw ga trlalu susah sama materi ,, . Bekerjak pun ,, gw ga ambisiyuzh ,, secukupnya ajah ,, yg sekali lagi gw yakin sudah di cukupkan oleh allah swt ,,, .

i hv good salary for single life and hv no burden to take ,, . So alhamdulillah i hv no issue for financial matter. I dont take loan from the bank ,, if i dont have money, then i dont buy stuff ,, . Then i dont hv a house also ,, wkkwkwkkwkwkwk ,, kozh a house is very very xpensive thing to buy as cash ,, wkkwkwkwkkw ,, . Then what i do with that money ?? pleasure my self for sure ,, wkkwkwkwkkwkw ,, . kl bisa di nikmatin ,, kenapa tidak ??? wkwkwkkwkwkw ,, . Gada tabungan jugak ,, . Yaaa ,, di nikmatin ajah ,, kekekkekekeke ,,

so how i see this world ?? it just kind of ,, city ,, transit city ,, quite long ,, kozh it takes my whole life time ,, . i dont need to take it so seriously in this duniyak ,, . I dont need to be a big person ,, to do great thing for world changing ,, i just need to act to do on allah’s coridor ,, dalam taqwa dan taat ,, . Udah ituh ajah ,, sesimple ituh pikiran gw ,, wkkwkwkkwkwk >> ya gmna mo maju yk idup gw ,, wkkwkwkwk << . Ya ,, mgkin karena gw ga brkeluwarga ,, jadi ga trlalau banyak tekanan pikiran dan tuntutan ,,, pastinya yezh ,, .

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then ,, mana yg benar ?? kenapa jarang sekali ,, jaraaaaaaaanngg sekali ,, orang sepemikiran ma gw ,, then gw ga bisa brain storming ,, yg bisa bikin gw evaluate my self ,, yg bisa reminding gw untuk tetep di jalan yg bener ,, untuk another good things ,, .

I feel different in my friendship cycle ,, most of not interesting on their conversation theme ,, ( aseli ga penting di pikiran gw ,, ) ,,, . But ya ,, joining with them is just for fun ,,, balancing my life compare my hour’s life ,, .

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then ya allah ,, fix me pleaseeee ,,, . Prbaiki akuwh ,, mana yg benar mana yg salah ,, lindungilah akuw dari keburukan duniyak dan akhirat ya alalh ,,, ,, amin amin amin ,,

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week 1 ,,,

one week ppkm ,, ol dayzh fulfil with works ,, ( of korzh not include wiken yezh gaiiizzh ,, #not yet ,,, wkkwkwkw ,,, ) ,,, no olga ? ,, and yezh ,, i feel like a stranded whale at kemVangan ,,, ,, wkwkkwkwkkwkwkw ,,, ???

apalah apalah yezzhh ,,, 1 week + wiken ,, aseli di rumah ajah ,,, kerjaakk ,, makaaann ,,, and wiken kek gini ,,, netflik an ,,, kekekekkeke ,, . Alhamdulillah ya allah ,,, di tengah banyak orang di luwar sana kudu tetep kluwar rumah dengan segala resiko nya ,, alhamdulillah kami msh ada privillage wat di rumah ajah tanpa kekurangan 1 apa pun .. alhamdulillah ,,, bener2 alhamdulillah sangat ,,, alhamdulillah ,,,

jadi susih ga fi ppkm ???
ummhhh ,,, not that susih sik ,, . Betenya ga bisa olga di t4 olga ajah ,, ga bisa mandi er anget ,,, ga bisa jalan around2 ,,, gada prubahan ,,, . Hivuran gw xuman ke hypermart ,,, wkwkkwkwkkw ,,, . Lain dr ituh, ga kluwar2 guwaaaa ,,, . Gofut ajah ampe gw beda2in tiap hari nya ,, biar dinamis ajah hari2 gw ,, kwkwkwkkwk ,, . and one thing for sure ,,, if lockdown happen, then my bill lowest ,,, ahahhahahha ,, . Even last year ,,, 1st lock down ,, i hv zero bill ,,, wkkwkwkwkkw ,, mantul ga tuh ,,, .

maybe mang gw yg introvert sejati yezh ,,, or maybe it just called nature ,,, . Kek gini nih ,,, less interaction with others makes my ^sensitive thought^ get sharper ,,, ahahhahahah ,, . I can see ^vision^ more clearly ,,, . Was ,, its common for me ,,, through the times am become socialism person, that am become normal person ,,, ahhahahahhaha ,,, . enjoy one ,, !!

Cov Update ,,

makin banyak ajah orang yg meninggal karena cov ,,, . Kalo kemaren beritak meninggal dari beritak ,, skrg dari wasap or wag ,,, masya allah ,, .

Dari yg gw ceritak ,,, since mggu kemaren ada ajah keluwarga karyawan yg kenak ,, mggu ini beritaknya dh mule ke karyawannya ,,, ahuhuhuhuh ,, ya Tuhaaann ,,, . Dan sore iniiiii ,, kary haO meninggal karna Cov ,,, . Masih mudiiii ,,, 32 tahunn ,, . ini jadi case prtama kary haO meninggal karna Cov ,,, .

Workzh ,,,

should be nya kan yezh ,,, july dh start ke alloc section ,, tapiiiiiiiiiiii ,, masih kerjak scm kwkwkkwk ,, . Blom bisa TK yg baik ,, . Gw sik semangat ,, tapi keknya ncang ga semangat ,, wkkwkwkwkwk ,, .

after gw emosi ma pa bozh kemarenan ,, akhirnya gw slow down ,, dan follow2 ajeee ,, . Terush akhir2nya ,, mule realistis lagi gw ,,, . Hadjuuuu ,, ga vener dh nik ,, . Tapiiiiiiiiiiii ,, ga benernya lihat dari sisi yg mana ,,, wkwkwkwk ,, . Nothing so hard di ajiiiiiiiiiiii ,, jadiiii ikutin ajee pun ga efisien or apalah apalah ,, xixixiixixixi ,,, .

But can i follow this role ?? ,,, been that role for 3 years ,,, why i could not for next ??? ahahahhahahha ,,,, . Ini tuuuuuuuuuuuu ,, same question jugaaaaaaaaa and same answer jugaaaaaaaa waktu jaman nsd ,, wkkwkwkkwkwk ,, . I said to my self ,, :: jika bisa tahan 4 taun ,, pasti masih bisa tahan taun2 berikutnya ,,, ahahahahahhah ,, .

Aje gileee ,, dri jaman gw masuk aji ,, dh berapa x dh mpe puntjak mo resign yk ,, tapi ga resign2 ,, kwkkwkwkw ,,, . Lah gw nge gembel kl resign ,,, kagag ada yg ngasih makan gw ,, xiixixixiix ,,, . Jadiiiii ,, keknya prtanda awed till pension di mari dh ,, xiixixixixi ,, ??

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