Something wrong with me ,,, what happen yezh ,,, so galawzh ga jelazh ,,, otak ini masih mencari2 kenapa dan pola yg cocok dengan gejala2 sebelumnya ,,, #hallah ,,, mostly i felt sad ,,, but i dont know why ,,, why ??? ,,, and my behaviour become lower then ,,, haizzhhh ,, hopefuly get well soon ya fii ,,,
Something wrong ,,,
Minggoeh, 31May2015
pheewww … my body felt so remeeekk .. rasa abis ketiban kontener … faktor U yezh … ahhahahah … . Ga deenngg … i think .. i just more bit cruel to my body lately months … have no rest … . But, after this … have no trip anymore yexzhh … next year again yeezzzhh … hehehehheeh 😀
So … have felt weird feeling this week … felt sad mostly … maybe because closing to my period … and it is … xixiixixi …. . And have trip to kawah putih yesterday … Logistic-NEF gathering … hahahhahaha … .
Friday Night, they pick up us from sunter-ho … and then we went to Bandung. haiyaahh … apke acara nyasar lagih … wakakkakakka … . after wisata malam .. finally we arrived at kawah putih on Saturday early morning 4 aM … ahahhahahhaah … setressshhh …. .
Lucuuuu … jadiii… qt kan naek ke atas tuh less than 7 am yezzhh … yg so pasti ticketing lum bukaaaaa . Eee .. pas dah di atas di samperin orang sonohnya, dan ditagihin dah … . Semua orang pada ‘mundur’ … ada yang cek2 hape .. sok nelpon (yg padahal ga ada sinyal) … so ambil tas dll … yang akhirnya pa yohanez yg maju ke tuh orang tuk nego .. dan bayarin qt semua … wakakkakakkakak …. . Setelah semua clear, tiba2 orang2 pada berkumpul lagi … wakkakakakkakak … sumpah itu lucu bangeddd … wakkakakakkaka … .
Take a good moments and pictures …
and thheeennn … get bad headache … !! weeeww .. its felt sooooo suffeerrr … . Untung ga mimisan yes … cuman bikin lidah mpe rasa semutan … . When i woke up in this murning … felt so litbit release … rasa abis ngalamin topan baday dan tsunami di kepalak … wwkkwkwkwk … .
And am wondering … dr. partiban said … i having migrain chronic … so i have to treat my self with this world related to my triger’s migrain. But, di thinking2 yesss … its more huge effort donk for me while have to treat that … . Let say, when i having out with my friends … absolutely we have loud of music .. loud of laugh … and so on … . How come i said to my friends … ssstt … please dont be so loud … i have a migrain !! … wakkakakakkakak … . So … ini masalah gw yezh … bukan mereka … . Memang ini menajdi konsekwensi gw yang harus dijalani … get headache with all of that trigers yezh … enjoying one … .
Next … marhaban ya ramadhaaann … alhamdulillah … . Tobaaatt hafiiiiiiiiiiii …. tobaaatttttt …. !!! hahahhahahah
In this point,,,
,,, aq memilih untuk tidK melihat hal2 yan membuwatkuw sedih dan hancur ,,, walupun kenyataan nya seperti itu ataw akan seperti itu ,,,
… Aq memilih memandang hidup dr zona nyamankuwh untukk berfikir dan melaluinyagh ,,,
,,, maybe from this point ,,, i”ll be far away from God ,,,
Zenin, 25.May.2015
Felt weird by tudeyzh ,,, .
Happy so much having a chance in that company when i received the invitation email for interview. But also worried in many things bout my capabilities related to their needs … . Also with tatoo on my hand ,,, hehehehhe ,,, .
Miris while lunch time ,,, . Listening my friends sharing happy stories about their healthy children during i remembering about my friends daughter who had to fight with cancer in a little age … . Also, lisyul calls while lunch time ,,, she is through her 1st day in the new office ,,, must be so different environtment ,,, .
And tonight ,,, feel so sad ,,, i dont know why ,,, so sad ,,, . In my way home ,,, ya, i remembering many stories ,,, old stories ,,, about karma ,,, about what i hv seen last night ,,, about now ,,, about next ,,, . Litbit Confuse for what i hv to do with my life next ,,, .
Hhhh ,,, maybe its just closing with ny periode ,,, its all about HORMON yeezzhhh ,,, hehehhehehe
Egh ??? Still distruct fi ?? Owh come on ,,, focus !!! Xixiixixixi
—
Dpt apdetan enih ::
Minggoe, 24May2015
minggoe … minggoe kuwh … . Me time kuwh … with my dmf kuwh .. alhamdulillah kuwwhh … . its alwayzh nice can go here and enjoying my fave coffee … .
ternyatagh !! … its not took that long for me … maybe arround 1 week … ???? … . Feels quite good right now … . Btw, kenapa kalo abis num coffee sekarang tuh malah ngantukzh yeezzhhh … haiizzhh … .
akhir2 ini banyak orang baik dalam level masing2, meninggal duniya loh ,,, apakah kaliyan tidak memperhatikan nya ??? … Mungkin kiyamad sudah dekat … . jadi … jika qt masih hidup sampai dengan saat ini … qt bukan termasuk golongan orang yang baik ???? wkwkwkkwkwkwk … #nyodorin kaca … menurut nganaaa …. ????
Heeehh … lots of stories last few months … . I want to share what in my thoughts right now … ::
one voice in my head said :: sapa suruh maen di duniya, tanggung sendiri akibatnya .... .
xixixixixi … iyah iyah iyah … . Duniya ini begitu nikmat … lagi pula gw butuh … abis enak sih … #qt lagi ngomongin apaan seh ?? wakkakakakkakk … . hmmhh … its so exhausted … high speed … feelin so instant … up and down so fast … . Cooll … but its so exhausted … . am i get being “kapok” … . Hehehhehe … no i am not … 😛 … . Hey … this is where i lived … nikmatilah … 🙂
why nothings goes right in my life ????
ummhhh … iyesss … there are nothing goes right in my lifes … wakkakakakkak … . But, its all about God stories … . So, the question is :: Why God makes nothings goes in my life ??? . wakakkakakkak … . Damn !! i Love my Lord … . What ever will be ya will be lah … . Mungkin gw ga akan pernah jadi alim … ga akan pernah jadi hamba yang baik … . But you know one thing that i believe till right now … I’ll meet my Lord one day … seeing the face … seeing my creator … in good condition at the end … 🙂 aamiinn … .
Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing
and rightdoing there is a field.
I’ll meet you there.When the soul lies down in that grass
the world is too full to talk about.
Rumiini kata2 keyen abis yeezzhhh … . keyen bingid bingid dan bingiiiddd … . Ahhh … ada fase … di mana hubungan manusia dan tuhannya hanya sebatas … believing ada yg maha besar di luar sana … ada yang sebatas takut dosa dan mengharapkan pahala tanpa perduli esensi Tuhan itu sendiri … ada yang pada begitu mencinta Tuhan sampai tidak peduli apa itu surga dan neraka … .
Dan yang diajaran Rasul Muhammad adalah sebuah peradaban manusia … . Baginda bisa saja menjadi sufiers … tapi rasul ditaqdirkan sebagai messenger … untuk membangun peradaban manusia yang lebih baik. Itu berhasil … dan akan hancur anyway … . Karena tidak ada yang kekal di duniya ini yes … .
Dan apakah xan bisa melihat keindahan nya di situ ?? keindahan Tuhan akan semua yang terjadi di duniya ini ???
itu orang yeeee … cari gara2 banged idupnya … . Make CC kk guwa yang mana tagihannya masuk cc guwa … sebanyak 25juta an … . Bikin gw gejala struk aja tuh orang. Mana tracknya dy suka ga bayar lagi … apezh dah … . Bentar lagi gw struk beneran keknya … #elus2 dada … apa elus2 bule aja ??? wakkakakakkakakkk …
Nyekar …
last thursday ??? i visited to my Moms graveyard … nyekar kalo bahasa dimari mah … . It just cross in my mind ajah, when i passed that area in the murning in my way to office … . So, i turn back and went to my momzh grave yard. The gate still locked, but i can open it … . And bikozh its already long time not visiting my mom, so … make me confuse for a while where i hv to find the gravestone. But, just need ngeker dikit, and whollaa … found one !! … hehehhehe … .
Mizh her so much … . hhh … maybe because in that moment, i am facing big matter … so i went to her grave … just wanna sharing what so heavy in this heart … . hehehheheheh …. . Siting praying crying … may aLLah meet us next yezh mom … . You with your happiness … and i with my happiness … aamiinn … 🙂 … Love you mom … 🙂
we are not that close … but somehow … loosing her … become so painfull …. . So i update in my socmed … “karena qt satu jiwa” … . I dont know exactly with others when their loosing their mom … but i can still feel it .. when i loosing her … seperti satu jiwa yang ditarik/dipisahkan dengan paksa … . dan ituuuu … amat sangat banged bingid menyakitkan !!! indeeeddd !!! … . Entah, apa ada yang lebih menyakitkan dari pada ituh …. ???? … .
But somehow yeezzhhh … about my status in socmed … people connecting to my old story … about irsal ?? wakkakakak … . Kenapa jadi dikaitkan ke doi yak ??? hadeehhh … aya2 waeeee …. .
Garden,,,
,,, d atas benar dan salah ,,, ada taman yang indah ,,, and i’ll meet you there ,,, <katanya rumi kl ga salah>
udpate 24.05.2015, di cariin lisyul full version nya ::
kenapa kata2 ini begitu keyen yeezzhh …
Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing
and rightdoing there is a field.
I’ll meet you there.
When the soul lies down in that grass
the world is too full to talk about.
Rumi
