friday night septh 13 2013

i feel sad by few back days … since nge-drugzh …. xixixiixixi :p. gpp lah ya sedih …. this is kan friday night …. my friday night …. . hmmhh … bener2 dah ni ati …. akal sehat yg menerorkuwh (mananya yg sehat kalo neror? ???) dan akal ini pula lah yg menyelamatkankuwh … karena tidak ada yg bisa menenangkan kuwh saat ini kecuali pikirankuwh sendiri dan keajaiban dari Tuhan …. .

apalah otak ini berfikir begitu liar antara dunia dan akhirat … antara nafsu kuwh, kemanusiaankuwh, dan sejatikuwh sebagai hamba. … . berasa bisa memikirkan tentang semuanya. .. if you that smart enough. … you will know your ending point dear …. . but you cant reach that point. … and nothings wrong with that. .. it just because you are so human. … .

dear God. … do You know what the meaning emptiness for me? ?? when i believe in is nothing. .. and its happening. … . year by year. .. people by people. .. keep involving with those without i can understand and tolarate those. … where are You God? ?? pleaaseee. … dont look that busy. … need You so much here …. . please help me for this one. … i cant handle this. … i cant handle my heart. … Engkau lah pemilik hati … tolonglah tenangkan hati ini. … krna tiada satu kejadian pun tanpa persetujuanMu. .. tolonglah hafi Tuhan. … tolonglah. …

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loose ..

 

… hilang arah …

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Nge drugzh …

Nge-drugzh mode ON
Moga akal sehat ttp d depan
….
…..

Honesty1,
You know what … Sometimes it cross in my mind to cut my vein … While i think so wild bout God … I just want to stop it … I dont want to think that wild to my God … Because i cant handle it up … The risks …

Honestly2,
You know what … Gw pernah ga solat arround one month … One month after my mother passed away … Because am angry with God … Because God not give me back my mother … Because what i believe in God is nonsen … Because loosing my mother was the most painful thing in my life …

Honestly3,
Sometimes … Am so surprise that am not crazy for what i’ve been through … But ummghhh, orang gila mana yg ngaku gila ???? Xixixixxix

Honestly4,
Am not for giving peoples that already hurted me … am just trying to … But after i’ve that dream … I have a deal with God to release all that hatred … But ummghhh, who knows gonna happen next for exactly ???? Beside … Maybe am become one of most got happy when you all got sadness …

Honestly5,
If … I hv a chance to live again … I asked to be hafi … And get happiness with my world … And for my next world … I just want to meet my God …

Honestly6,
Whatever my family condition is … Am thankful for my parent that already rised me with good basic religion … whatever my spirit condition now …

Honestly7,
Am soooo introvert … Xixixiixixixxi

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nge-fans …


… aymiyosotide …

* … nge-fans ma yg tonggos … *

 

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My next exam …

My dream before subuh … Describing my life next … About the core of my happiness in the middle of my world … Maybe its gonna be my next exam … The hard one … The core one … As always … Hehehhehehe … Wheeeww what a life …

The thing that make me pride is … God always examine in my believing core … The hardest … . But in the other side … Hikzhhh idup oh iduuuppp … Kok gini amat yaaakk … Wakakakakkakakak

Whatever my role on … Hidup itu harus bahagia … ( hm ??? Hahahaha i wrote down this … And i will examined on this … Xixixixixi )

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bohong …

am i a liar ??? yes … i am … . There is a thing that fake of mine … continuously ??? yes it is … in God times …  it just umghh … yaa gitu deeehh … hehehhehe … 😀 … . But … still i want to share about lying … .

You know what … a liar is a smart person … because they keep everything in they head constantly and continuously … and its cool … . But somehow … its gonna be killed you finally … becauseeeee … you are a human … not machine … hehehhehe 😀 … . Still you can not keep all that long … isnt it ???? xiixixixix … . Just like a wise word said … ::

bukan berapa berat beban yang kau pikul … tetapi berapa lama kau memikulnya …

we are just human being anyway … and its nice tobe human …. at all …. 🙂

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buka aura …

 

# naughty thought edition#

pernah gitu ya … there is a friend of mine … chit chat ngalor ngidul getohhh … and then we arrive in the marriage theme … . he said :: maybe you need go to the kiayi something to open your aura (regarding to get marriage soon)… . I answered as usual … . But my mind already have naughty thought … :

ga peke open2 aura ajaaaa … gw dah cakep geneehh … apalagi buka aura yaakk … glowing gw rasa …. dah kek bohlamm …. wakkakakkakkakak …

sometimes … you can not stop your mind going through …. xixiixixixi 😛

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friday night … 06092013

umghh friday night … feeling so blue ??? still going on fi ??? yihaaa … xixiixixixi … .  just wanna share something for today …

big mouth … . ya ya ya … maybe i just kind of (sorry) autism that dont really talk too much or gave more expression to something … . egh … as objective thought … i declair i am taciturn … kekekkekekek … . *lanjut* … I just wondering to people that so easy to talk more and so easy to get angry … so easy to judging … so easy to more … so easy to be pride … heheheheh … . when i am listening to them … one thought in my mind :: human … (loh emang gw enggag ??? kekekekkeek) . and its nice tobe human … can feel so high in one side … with out feel/think that they gonna so dynamic on that side … . xixixiixix gw ngomong apa sehh ??? . The point is … hidup itu harus bahagia … hehheheheh

anyway … this is friday night … hehehhe my friday night …. 😛

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harus bahagia …

 

apa pun peran nya …
hidup itu harus bahagia …

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